Man Candy! Yum, yum, yuummmm..

I have always been a sucker for the guy with the hair a little longer (although NO mullets please!), the jeans a little torn and the fuck me boots a little scuffed. If he was on a motorbike, or sitting on the beach with a guitar I was probably already wet and approaching him with a smile..

So it will come as no surprise to you to see which men on the silver-screen make me go weak at the knees. It wasn’t the ones that brought the flowers, the jocks or the high flying corporates with money. It was the surfer dudes and the biker boys, the guys with swords and the men on horseback. Strong, swashbuckling, masculine men, from a time when men where men and women were grateful (and not trying to emasculate them by making them peel eggs).

Maybe we can blame Magnum PI, Knight Rider, Airwolf and MacGyver. All them “I travel alone” types who left women in their beds with messy hair and lipstick smeared. No sign of commitment on the horizon.

Moving into my teens the pretty boys came into play and I learnt all about “The Game”. We want them to stay, we want love (yes, at 15 I want full blown hot sex love!), we want commitment, the forever and ever kind and we will just die if we don’t get it.. So we go phwooaarr over the young bucks they feed us in Beverly Hills 90210, 21 Jump Street, New Kids on the Block..

But now.. I am older, I am wiser and I a most importantly single. Which puts me into a completely different perve catergory all together. I know the tricks, I know the rules to the game (even the ones that have changed, plus I don’t wanna play anymore in any case). Now I can be the dirty girl. I can say as I please, pinch, poke and harangue to my hearts content. The stiletto is on the other foot baby! Now the men that make me go phwoarr do it for ALL sorts of reasons and if I could roll these characteristics into one I still wouldn’t have the perfect man, so why bother. All in know is that he’s gonna fucking beautiful to look at, a whole lot of fun for a night out, the best lay I’ve ever had but I still get to sleep like a starfish across MY bed and snore to my hearts content! And I don’t have to pick up his underpants off my bathroom floor in the morning..

Ok so we’ve got a list of men that is obscenely long so I am going to have to cut out Vampires and Werewolves (you know who you are). And leave the young men alone for fear of the Peadophile Police knocking on my door later this evening (I think the werewolf may fall into this category).. I eventually have to give you my top 5 ultimate Panty Droppers of 2010, although it takes nothing away from the rest of you my darlings, my works of art…

Number One: Ryan Reynolds

Ok wait I have to take a break. Just looking at his picture dries my throat and loosens the cotton threads in my panties! I don’t need to say any more.. Just LOOK at him!! PHHWWOAARRR!!
For more, watch The Proposal, Blade Trinity, X-Men (which also has another favourite Hugh Jackman). Not only is he all muscle and yum, the boy is funny. And as I always say.. If you can make me laugh, you can probably take me home.

Number Two: Matthew McConnaughey

The southern gentleman whose voice makes my heart beat faster, Matthew McConnaughey, who’s lovely curls and tight abs make me want to do delicious things to him in his caravan on the beach. It’s definitely the accent and the way he say “Ladies..”

Number Three: Taye Diggs

He’s strong, and he’s a doctor, and he’s sweet and he gets so overlooked in Private Practice!
This man deserves some between-the-sheet time! That smile is sure to twist any women right around his little finger..

Number Four: Hugh Jackman (AKA Wolverine)

I don’t even know if you need me to say anymore. Do you? Hot shit on screen, fighting for the love of his life, and in real life the quintessential family man who dotes on his wife and children. Personally, in my fantasy, he comes to bed with those talons on!

Number Five: Patrick Dempsey

McDreamy, McSteamy, don’t care, come & see me! Oh how I wish you were my doctor and no I wouldn’t sue you. Lovely doc has come a long way since delivering pizza’s and servicing middle aged ladies in Loverboy! I hope when he’s broke one day he will go back to delivering pizzas and servicing old ladies, Patty I will be waiting.

Piece of Fluff: David “Don’t Speak” Beckham.

Not the smartest of bedfellows David would be a Duct Tape Fuck. He just must NOT talk!
So pretty, so stylish, so in touch with his feminine side. Word of advice, don’t put a mirror in the room whilst you are busy getting busy. His image of himself will be stiff competition for you..

Special mention has to go to chaps like Gerard Butler. Who can resist Jerry’s accent in PS I love you. He made me want to move to Ireland, find a bangle wearing, leather clad, guitar toting irish lad and fuck his brains out. Then make him sing me to sleep… Lovely Jerry..

And we cant forget the good ol’ faithfuls like George Clooney and of course the original pretty boy Mr Angelina Jolie. Although Sexy Brad has really lost some of his appeal since he traded his testicles for a château in France, 500 children and an anorexic wife. Go back to Jen Brad, and get some of your diginity and fans back.

And there are so many others, and so many more coming onto the scene every day. I literally can’t keep up. So I just keep watching, keep perving drooling admiring and keep wet wipes in my handbag!